This story is about to be published in an anthology from the North Carolina Writer's Network:
Some of ya’ll might have heard about the bear that staged a break-in at the
WNC Nature Center in Asheville awhile back. Accordin’ to media reports a yearling black bear scaled a ten foot fence and dropped in to do a little visitin’ with the center’s herd of deer. Bob Fay, the nature center’s critter curator, said the deer “didn’t much appreciate the visitor.” Why wouldn’t Bambi welcome a friendly visit with his ole buddy Smokey the Bear?
Speakin’ of visitin’ that reminds me of the time brother bear visited my Aunt
Lucille. Aunt Lucille was a nurse up at C.J. Harris hospital and a lot of times she’d work over-time and get back to the house pretty late. Her husband Rufus would leave the back door unlocked when he left to go to work at the mill in Sylva ‘cause sometimes Aunt Lucille would forget her key to the house. The bolt on the back door didn’t catch too well and Aunt Lucille had been pestern’ Uncle Rufus to fix it for the longest time.You know how us men-folks can be with those honey-do’s though.
It had been a cool spring with a late freeze and most of the berries and such that bears and other critters in the woods ate just weren’t coming out. A big ‘ole black boar bear happened to be huntin’ up some garbage cans close to town and scented Aunt Lucille’s pot roast simmerin’ on the back of the stove. He peered into the house and spotted a plate of cookies settin’ on the kitchen table like they was just waiting for him! Well it weren’t long ‘fore brother bear just happened to nose up to the back door and give it a little push. The pearly gates opened up and brother bear was in heaven!
First, brother bear devoured the oatmeal-raisin cookies on the kitchen table.
Like a lot of us folks brother bear’s motto was dessert first main course later.
Next he attacked the pot roast on the back of the stove—sliding it frontwards and spilling the juicy meat and vegetables all over the kitchen floor. A perfect mess!
After devouring the tasty pot roast off the kitchen floor, brother bear smelled a strange scent coming from the pantry. He ambled over to the pantry door pushing it open. There sittin’ in the corner was Uncle Rufus’ beer crock plum full of strong bubblybrew. After chowing down on the cookies and the pot roast brother bear had a powerful thirst. He knocked the heavy clay top off and commenced to slurpin’ up Uncle Rufus’ best homebrew.
When ‘ole brother bear was done he belched contentedly and feeling a little
sleepy padded up the stairs wobbling from side-to-side. Nosing the bedroom door open
brother bear saw Lucille and Rufus’ bed which looked just fine for a post-feast nap.
Aunt Lucille came home to find the back door wide open to the world. She
took one look at the hog wallow in her kitchen and just about had a hissy fit.
“That man,” she thought, “he’s a gonna get my broom on his backside” as she
commenced to cleanin’ up.
When Aunt Lucille got done cleaning up the mess she was plum wore
Out. As she started to the head of the stairs she could hear the snorin’ and thought to herself, “Rufe ate all that pot roast, cleaned out the brewin’ crock of homemade beer and now it sounds like he’s logging the whole forest. Can’t I ever get any rest?”
The light was burnt out in the hallway and Aunt Lucille felt her way up the stairs to the bedroom that she and Uncle Rufus shared. As she opened the door the snoring from brother bear sounded like hogs tussling over the feeding trough. Aunt Lucille got into her night gown and slippin’ into bed gave brother bear a poke with her elbow and said “Rufe quiet down so’s I can get a little sleep.” Brother bear grunted and shifted in his home brew induced stupor.
When brother bear wouldn’t quit snoring Aunt Lucille gave the bruin a little
nudge with her hip. Well brother bear didn’t like that too much and gave out a little growl that made Lucille sit up and take notice. She took one look at who her bed partner was and sprang out of bed like she’d seen the Booger man himself!
Aunt Lucille grabbed the broom settin’ in the corner and commenced to chasin’
brother bear ‘round the room. Just when she was gainin’ on him the bear would give a
little jump and get away. Finally, Aunt Lucille cornered the poor drunken bruin by the dresser and gave him a good whop with the broom. Brother bear saw his chance and
leaped towards the window like one of them gold medal winnin’ Olympic high jumpers
and crashed right through it. Aunt Lucille rushed to the window and all she could see was brother bear high-tailin’ it for the woods like a thirsty man headed for his still.
After that little incident Aunt Lucille made sure Uncle Rufus fixed that bolt on the
back door. So the next time you see brother bear pokin’ ‘round the backyard of your
‘little house in the big woods’ just remember he’s hungry and it’s his front yard!
Sunday, July 12, 2009
The Bones of the Hills
The bones of the hills, these ancient rocks,
First laid down untold eons ago
The foundations of the Appalachians, strong and cold
Hidden away from prying eyes, secrets in the earth
These ancient mountains, the backbone of Pangaea
super continent, of the entire world!
The super Appalachians fierce and proud,
stretching to Scotland--all the way to Africa!
Mighty Granite, Schist, Gneiss, Shale, Igneous and Sandstone rocks,
Their weathered forms, what we see today
Ancient volcanoes, continents forming,
Ripping apart, change from a restless earth!
Stretching out on the rocks, in the bright sunlight
Absorbing the warmth, of a summer’s day
From what once were the fires of hell itself
Bones faded and exposed, now only warm to the touch
Chuck Connors, June 30, 2009
First laid down untold eons ago
The foundations of the Appalachians, strong and cold
Hidden away from prying eyes, secrets in the earth
These ancient mountains, the backbone of Pangaea
super continent, of the entire world!
The super Appalachians fierce and proud,
stretching to Scotland--all the way to Africa!
Mighty Granite, Schist, Gneiss, Shale, Igneous and Sandstone rocks,
Their weathered forms, what we see today
Ancient volcanoes, continents forming,
Ripping apart, change from a restless earth!
Stretching out on the rocks, in the bright sunlight
Absorbing the warmth, of a summer’s day
From what once were the fires of hell itself
Bones faded and exposed, now only warm to the touch
Chuck Connors, June 30, 2009
Nighttime in the Country
Nighttime in the country, the shadows dark and deep
Fireflies all a’ glitter, the frogs chirp a roaring peep!
The critters of the night move stealthily from bush to hay
The baby skunks and tiny possums come out to snack and play
The riot of nocturnal flowers, their scent so sweet and full
The first cutting of the hay, the greased implements in the shed of tools
I gaze across the land, breathe in the wonder of the night
Could it be that I am hungry for more than just the sight?
To live a good and just life, a life that gives back to all the rest
Sharing with each other is really the ultimate test
We stare up at the lights, each one alone it seems
What gains a man the whole world if he cannot share his dreams?
Nighttime in the country, the quiet takes my soul
Under a billion stars I once again become whole.
Chuck Connors, May 30, 2009
Fireflies all a’ glitter, the frogs chirp a roaring peep!
The critters of the night move stealthily from bush to hay
The baby skunks and tiny possums come out to snack and play
The riot of nocturnal flowers, their scent so sweet and full
The first cutting of the hay, the greased implements in the shed of tools
I gaze across the land, breathe in the wonder of the night
Could it be that I am hungry for more than just the sight?
To live a good and just life, a life that gives back to all the rest
Sharing with each other is really the ultimate test
We stare up at the lights, each one alone it seems
What gains a man the whole world if he cannot share his dreams?
Nighttime in the country, the quiet takes my soul
Under a billion stars I once again become whole.
Chuck Connors, May 30, 2009
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
The River Rolls
by
Chuck Connors
The river rolls, the river rolls, all the way to the big wide sea
But who could really understand when you and I can’t see?
The river rolls, the river rolls, laughing across the rocks
It chuckles softly “come along,” you can play without your socks.
The river rolls, the river rolls, two lovers once loved along its banks
Years later when they were old and gray they came back and gave their thanks.
The river rolls, the river rolls, so deep and far and wide
It travels winding ways to the ocean and the tide.
The river rolls, the river rolls, it seems forever to me
One day I must follow it to find my destiny.
Chuck Connors
The river rolls, the river rolls, all the way to the big wide sea
But who could really understand when you and I can’t see?
The river rolls, the river rolls, laughing across the rocks
It chuckles softly “come along,” you can play without your socks.
The river rolls, the river rolls, two lovers once loved along its banks
Years later when they were old and gray they came back and gave their thanks.
The river rolls, the river rolls, so deep and far and wide
It travels winding ways to the ocean and the tide.
The river rolls, the river rolls, it seems forever to me
One day I must follow it to find my destiny.
Thursday, June 19, 2008
An Open Letter to the Citizens of Jackson County
by Chuck Connors
By and large our county manager, Mr. Ken Westmoreland, has done a good job with our county’s proposed 2008 – 2009 fiscal budget. I do have some questions and comments relating to the budget and to the g
eneral state of Jackson County.
Why do we need an Economic Development Commission (EDC)?
Whatever happened to the $568,000.00 the EDC loaned the Jackson Development Commission (JDC)?
When are we going to have the audit that was promised over two years ago? Audits were not done in 2006 and 2007.
I understand this loan was supposed to be paid back in one year. That was six years ago!
Now, that loan would be worth (with interest) approximately $620,000.00. Where is the money?
If the EDC has not forgiven that loan and the JDC is now defunct, do the taxpayers have to pay the EDC that loan of $620,000.00 as is being rumored?
Some people have said we don’t really need a full time EDC director because in a small county like ours there isn’t enough interest or need.
An ad hoc committee, activated from time to time, could work more effectively and be more responsive to the taxpayers.
The EDC doesn’t need another county employee working for it. We already have some financial accountability with the county’s financial director also acting as the treasurer of the group.
On other issues:
Why is the county allowing the Army Corps of Engineers to deny due process to the citizens of Jackson County in the coming environmental disaster of the elitist compounds of “Webster Ridge” and “Riverrock (Legasus)?”
Does the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ (Chaffin/Light) really believe that folks are taken in with the public relations stunt of a has-been golf professional brazenly opening one of his trout-killing courses on the anniversary (June 7, 2007) of the Scott’s Creek disaster? To paraphrase Charlie Daniels, “the eagle is flying low,” isn’t it?
This whole sad state of affairs has become a “Jacksongate” where the taxpayers get their pockets picked one more time by free-booting loose cannons. If the citizens of Jackson County aren’t getting the shaft from a herd of greedy developers, they’re getting it from our elected and appointed officials! I would strongly urge you, the Jackson County Commissioners, to take action now on the EDC/JDC fiasco, take a strong stand against re-building the dam on the BMP golf course and take immediate legal action to force the Army Corps of Engineers to hold a public hearing/public comment on the “Webster Ridge” debacle. These and other incidents have been “white elephants” on the taxpayers for too long. All we’re getting is a huge mess costing us hundreds of thousands of dollars (perhaps millions) and destroying our county with no end in sight. Is anyone else waiting for positive leadership on these issues? Cut to the chase gentlemen and do it now.
By and large our county manager, Mr. Ken Westmoreland, has done a good job with our county’s proposed 2008 – 2009 fiscal budget. I do have some questions and comments relating to the budget and to the g
eneral state of Jackson County.
Why do we need an Economic Development Commission (EDC)?
Whatever happened to the $568,000.00 the EDC loaned the Jackson Development Commission (JDC)?
When are we going to have the audit that was promised over two years ago? Audits were not done in 2006 and 2007.
I understand this loan was supposed to be paid back in one year. That was six years ago!
Now, that loan would be worth (with interest) approximately $620,000.00. Where is the money?
If the EDC has not forgiven that loan and the JDC is now defunct, do the taxpayers have to pay the EDC that loan of $620,000.00 as is being rumored?
Some people have said we don’t really need a full time EDC director because in a small county like ours there isn’t enough interest or need.
An ad hoc committee, activated from time to time, could work more effectively and be more responsive to the taxpayers.
The EDC doesn’t need another county employee working for it. We already have some financial accountability with the county’s financial director also acting as the treasurer of the group.
On other issues:
Why is the county allowing the Army Corps of Engineers to deny due process to the citizens of Jackson County in the coming environmental disaster of the elitist compounds of “Webster Ridge” and “Riverrock (Legasus)?”
Does the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ (Chaffin/Light) really believe that folks are taken in with the public relations stunt of a has-been golf professional brazenly opening one of his trout-killing courses on the anniversary (June 7, 2007) of the Scott’s Creek disaster? To paraphrase Charlie Daniels, “the eagle is flying low,” isn’t it?
This whole sad state of affairs has become a “Jacksongate” where the taxpayers get their pockets picked one more time by free-booting loose cannons. If the citizens of Jackson County aren’t getting the shaft from a herd of greedy developers, they’re getting it from our elected and appointed officials! I would strongly urge you, the Jackson County Commissioners, to take action now on the EDC/JDC fiasco, take a strong stand against re-building the dam on the BMP golf course and take immediate legal action to force the Army Corps of Engineers to hold a public hearing/public comment on the “Webster Ridge” debacle. These and other incidents have been “white elephants” on the taxpayers for too long. All we’re getting is a huge mess costing us hundreds of thousands of dollars (perhaps millions) and destroying our county with no end in sight. Is anyone else waiting for positive leadership on these issues? Cut to the chase gentlemen and do it now.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Frat Boys on Spring Break
by Chuck Connors
There’s a pattern happening here. A pattern insidious, hateful, destructive, and it’s aimed at you and me. In just the last few years Jackson County has taken on a tone, a dreadful resemblance similar to the destruction of the state of Florida. Build, build, build and the land and the public be damned.
For too long developers in Jackson County and the rest of Western North Carolina have been running hog wild like frat boys on spring break in Panama City. Our county has been their golden goose with dollar signs for eyes and guess who’s paying through the nose? It may turn out that the land development/steep slope ordinances need to be ‘tweaked’ and made more effective in stopping the developers in their race to destroy what little we have left—especially when there’s ‘cheaters’ such as the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ neatly halving the just fine that was imposed upon them for the illegal dam which caused the Scott’s Creek disaster. The public relations flim flam of a bought and paid for eagle imported from Tennessee won’t fly either. Nobody’s fooled.
Don’t forget Legasus and their Riverrock water pollution fiasco in-the-making on Cullowhee Mountain. If you think that Legasus hasn’t been doing everything they can to subvert the decision of the Army Corps of Engineers relating to all the streams that Legasus is going to bury in a pipe, you were born yesterday.
Two of the candidates running for county commissioner are obvious ‘plants’ by the developers. One candidate is the Eastern Band’s attempt to subvert the rest of Jackson County and another candidate is a sex offender.
The incumbents may not be perfect, but they see what is going on and are doing something right to preserve the old Jackson County for the future. They don’t want their grandchildren and yours to be forced out of Jackson County by sky-high land prices and elitist gated communities with signs reading, “Locals Keep Out.” Will you stand on your two legs and fight for what is right or will you be a slave on your knees? I know who and what I’m going to vote for May 6. Do you?
There’s a pattern happening here. A pattern insidious, hateful, destructive, and it’s aimed at you and me. In just the last few years Jackson County has taken on a tone, a dreadful resemblance similar to the destruction of the state of Florida. Build, build, build and the land and the public be damned.
For too long developers in Jackson County and the rest of Western North Carolina have been running hog wild like frat boys on spring break in Panama City. Our county has been their golden goose with dollar signs for eyes and guess who’s paying through the nose? It may turn out that the land development/steep slope ordinances need to be ‘tweaked’ and made more effective in stopping the developers in their race to destroy what little we have left—especially when there’s ‘cheaters’ such as the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ neatly halving the just fine that was imposed upon them for the illegal dam which caused the Scott’s Creek disaster. The public relations flim flam of a bought and paid for eagle imported from Tennessee won’t fly either. Nobody’s fooled.
Don’t forget Legasus and their Riverrock water pollution fiasco in-the-making on Cullowhee Mountain. If you think that Legasus hasn’t been doing everything they can to subvert the decision of the Army Corps of Engineers relating to all the streams that Legasus is going to bury in a pipe, you were born yesterday.
Two of the candidates running for county commissioner are obvious ‘plants’ by the developers. One candidate is the Eastern Band’s attempt to subvert the rest of Jackson County and another candidate is a sex offender.
The incumbents may not be perfect, but they see what is going on and are doing something right to preserve the old Jackson County for the future. They don’t want their grandchildren and yours to be forced out of Jackson County by sky-high land prices and elitist gated communities with signs reading, “Locals Keep Out.” Will you stand on your two legs and fight for what is right or will you be a slave on your knees? I know who and what I’m going to vote for May 6. Do you?
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Balsam Mountain Eagle a 'No Fly'
by Chuck Connors
Some of ya’ll might remember from a few weeks back all the hoopla in the papers and on the television about the eagle over there at the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve.’ Now being a bit ignorant when it comes to worldly things I figured to ask my Uncle Curtis what he thought about all these goings on. For those of you that don’t know my Uncle Curtis, he’s lived in these mountains for quite a spell; besides, he’s done a bit of traveling also.
“Uncle Curtis, did you hear about that eagle they got up there at that Chaffin/Light development?”
“Yea boy I heard about it,” he replied.
Now if you know my Uncle Curtis, he may not say much but what he says means a whole lot. “Well what exactly do you think about that eagle, ‘Spirit Augustus’, they got penned up there,” I asked.
“Boy, when you goin’ to learn that there ain’t no such thing as a free lunch. None of them big corporation people is going to give you or me the time of day unless they figure they can get somethin’ out of our pockets.”
“But Uncle Curtis, don’t you think it’s all good to be bringing back eagles to the mountains?”
“Shoot boy, all them corporate ‘charla-tans’ are trying to do is pull a sack over your pea-brained head. Didn’t you ever stop to think what that eagle’s name means? The Latin of spirit is spiritus which can mean either a ghost or liquor. All them Chaffin/Light money boys are trying to do is sell you a ghost. And if you ever heard about anybody seeing a ghost all they thought they saw was smoke. And anytime that any of your cousins said they saw a ghost they was all liquored up anyways. When somebody don’t want you to look someplace they’ll do some sorta neat trick to get you to look somewhere else. In the magician business they call it ‘smoke and mirrors’.”
When I got to thinking about it I figured that Uncle Curtis just might be right. What has the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ ever really done for me. Shoot, you can’t go in up there at Sugar Loaf anymore to do any hunting or fishing. They might as well have a sign that reads, “Locals Keep Out.” Remember that dam they had that burst? Chaffin/Light’s been trying to get out of payin’ for that disaster from the get go. Do ya’ll think that the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ really gives a hoot about our mountains and our ways? Like Uncle Curtis told me, “you can’t get something for nothing and them corporate bean counters want somethin’.”
Some of ya’ll might remember from a few weeks back all the hoopla in the papers and on the television about the eagle over there at the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve.’ Now being a bit ignorant when it comes to worldly things I figured to ask my Uncle Curtis what he thought about all these goings on. For those of you that don’t know my Uncle Curtis, he’s lived in these mountains for quite a spell; besides, he’s done a bit of traveling also.
“Uncle Curtis, did you hear about that eagle they got up there at that Chaffin/Light development?”
“Yea boy I heard about it,” he replied.
Now if you know my Uncle Curtis, he may not say much but what he says means a whole lot. “Well what exactly do you think about that eagle, ‘Spirit Augustus’, they got penned up there,” I asked.
“Boy, when you goin’ to learn that there ain’t no such thing as a free lunch. None of them big corporation people is going to give you or me the time of day unless they figure they can get somethin’ out of our pockets.”
“But Uncle Curtis, don’t you think it’s all good to be bringing back eagles to the mountains?”
“Shoot boy, all them corporate ‘charla-tans’ are trying to do is pull a sack over your pea-brained head. Didn’t you ever stop to think what that eagle’s name means? The Latin of spirit is spiritus which can mean either a ghost or liquor. All them Chaffin/Light money boys are trying to do is sell you a ghost. And if you ever heard about anybody seeing a ghost all they thought they saw was smoke. And anytime that any of your cousins said they saw a ghost they was all liquored up anyways. When somebody don’t want you to look someplace they’ll do some sorta neat trick to get you to look somewhere else. In the magician business they call it ‘smoke and mirrors’.”
When I got to thinking about it I figured that Uncle Curtis just might be right. What has the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ ever really done for me. Shoot, you can’t go in up there at Sugar Loaf anymore to do any hunting or fishing. They might as well have a sign that reads, “Locals Keep Out.” Remember that dam they had that burst? Chaffin/Light’s been trying to get out of payin’ for that disaster from the get go. Do ya’ll think that the Balsam Mountain ‘Preserve’ really gives a hoot about our mountains and our ways? Like Uncle Curtis told me, “you can’t get something for nothing and them corporate bean counters want somethin’.”
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
